5 Things to Do to Go from Victim to VICTOR
When things are tough, when bad things have happened, when we think we are alone, when we are miserable and the future is bleak, most of us crawl into a dominant thought pattern that keeps us down. The Victim Mentality is a virus that infects us all from time to time. The prescription to get better from this malady rests with our thoughts—not just “positive thinking” alone which can make us feel better—but a shift in our thought paradigm which can help us be better. That kind of self-awareness led famous singer Wynonna Judd to observe, “In my darkest hours I had a choice to make. I could be a victim or a victor.”
Here are some tips to keep in mind:
Make the choice. Decide to get off the hamster wheel taking you nowhere. No matter how unfair or difficult the issue that has hit you, take responsibility for yourself and choose to change. Simple things. Change your morning routine. Change your look. Change your habits. Mixing things up can give you a new view. A new view can give you a fresh start. Begin by choosing to change.
Face the truth. Do a self-evaluation. Go deep. Be brutally honest with yourself, avoiding any hint of self-deception. Become aware of your dominant thought pattern. Is it uplifting, filled with light? Or does it drag you down into depression and darkness? That is your starting point.
Make your plan. You start from where you are. There is no shame in admitting your problem, placing responsibility properly, and deciding to improve. Don’t try to be perfect—you’ll fail. Do try to be better. Remember, to actually BE better is better than simply feeling better.
Act. Implement your plan. Adjust it as necessary along the way. An important question each day of your journey is to ask, “What is the next step?” Then do it!
Trust the process. Never give up. Never give up! NEVER GIVE UP!!
IMPORTANT Bonus Tip: Find someone to help you make your journey from Victim to Victor. Maybe a close friend or family member, if they are stable enough to respect your vision and will not view you through the harsh microscope of judgment and criticism. In developing anew, the ability to respond to the things that happen without remaining Victims, many have found it useful to engage a New View Concepts Certified Personal Response-Ability CoachTM, someone who has been trained in this process. Find that helper and guide who can encourage and keep you on track. Contact us for information about our certified Personal Response- Ability CoachesTM if you would like and we can put you in touch with someone who will enhance your chance for success in a timely manner. “Response-ability—because to BE better is better than to simply feel better.
—Jesse L. Dunn, adapted from the GO Broken to Beautiful Badass™ Manual for Personal Response-Ability CoachesTM
“You can’t expect to be a ‘Victor’ if you’re living with a ‘Victim’ mentality.” — Billy Cox
“Go forward and not backward. Courage…and on, on to the victory!” — Joseph Smith, Jr.